𝒲𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝒶𝓂 𝐼 𝐹𝑒𝑒𝓁𝒾𝓃𝑔?

I wish I know what I’m feeling.
Maybe then I can solve the problem.
Maybe then I can find the root cause.
Until then, there’s no chance of healing.
There’s no chance of fighting to win.
I’ve been letting this darkness consume me.
I surrendered a while ago.
Now I just don’t recognize myself.
I don’t recognize a gain or a loss.
Not in this place.
They all seem like they’re part of my life cycle.
Like my life is only a test from the Bible.
I wish I know what I’m feeling.
Then I could feel a bit better.
Not by default, but just a progress to a genuine smile.
Maybe I’m meant to feel this way.
Maybe the devil is idle.
Either way, I feel like my emotions have been in tug of war and there’s never a winner.

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